It was all because of the alien abduction.
You know how it is ― that box came up on my computer, saying: Congratulations! You have been randomly chosen for the honor of an alien abduction! Click the “okay” button if this is acceptable to you.
So I did, and I was gone for a week. Unfortunately, I think the teleporter glitched, because my paper got deleted. So, can I have an extra week to finish it?
Teacher’s response: Yes, but you are reminded that students are only allowed one abduction per semester. If abducted again, please contact your overlord to complain.
Author’s Note: My roommate in college was required to write a paper called “The Reason Why My Paper is Late” whenever she turned in a paper that was late. So I volunteered to write one for her. This came from that. (Her teacher didn’t believe a word of it.)